January 1, 2007
I don't normally celebrate the New Year or even think that much about it. But 2006 with all its disappointment
and failure was not a normal year. I needed to think about it. I needed to give it some kind of send off.
Granted, I had successfully done the dance of the phoenix. I rose in tact out of the fire and ashes
several times. I was on track again. My feet were on solid ground pointed in the direction I wanted to go.
Slowly, steadily even with less control over the situation than I was comfortable with, I was putting one foot in front of
the other.
I should have been congratulating myself for a job well done but somehow, I still
hadn't put it all behind me. I kept glancing back over my shoulder to look at what had fallen into ruin instead of facing
forward with a full head of steam into the new, beautiful, open territory that stood in front of me. All that free,
open space to create whatever I wanted and I kept holding on to what was. If I had been Lot's wife, I would have turned
into a pillar of salt. I had to look back at what was destroyed.
I noticed I still had the keys to all that I had lost on my key chain. I don't know why I had never
thrown them away. It may have been I was still grieving the loss. Like a friend of mine whose husband had died
suddenly. Too young, in his prime, so much to look forward to, she still hasn't erased his voice from the answering
machine. I suppose it was the last thing left to do. It would be the final lettling go and she wasn't ready to
do that yet.
So I still had the keys with me. Useless keys, although I doubt the locks were ever changed.
It was time to let go. I took them off the chain and threw them away. Not in the garbage can in the kitchen or
the trash bin in the car port. I took them to the big, blue monster trash bin outside the construction site across the
street. I hurled them in. I let the big, blue montster swallow them up whole. I felt better, for a moment
almost estatic and then hope crept in. Maybe 2007 will be better.
My big New Year's Eve included cleaning the carpets that were being taken over by coffee stains, food
stains of both the human and cat food variety as well as fur ball stains and even a little red hair dye thrown into the mix.
It's bad luck to go into the New Year with a dirty house so I figured there was no better time to do it.
As I stood in line at Albertson's waiting to return the rented carpet cleaning machine, I saw it.
A $24.95 botte of champagne at $5.00 off with a preferred shopper card. I had earned it. I had a little more money
than usual in the bank. So, I bought champagne.
This year is was not going to be the Trader Joe's $1.99 a bottle. The kind I had last year that
I couldn't even drink. Too sour, too bitter it even started off '06 with the bad taste of vinegar. No, this
time it was the real thing.
When I opened the bottle the cork's pop was soft, subtle and gentle. Very little fizzy foam.
It poured smooth as silk into the fluted glass with very little hiss but a lot of bubble.
The clock struck midnight and I sipped a little. It was the sweetest, fruitiest and most bubbly
champagne I had ever tasted. It tickled my lips with soft, tiny, irridescent bubbles and went down my throat with
cool ease. After three sips, I was giddy and giggly with delight.
Goodbye '06 and hello '07. My head was clear and my spirit free and light. I laughed
and kissed the closest cat to me. I kissed the black cat right on the head and wished him a happy New Year.
Mr. Jazz looked at me puzzled and a bit dismayed. But then I have no tolereance for alcohol and three sips was all I
needed to float into the New Year.
